Post by Kiwipushrod on Nov 9, 2013 17:54:39 GMT -5
Dennis sent Me this email.
Can the government make me buy a boat? BUT WAIT!! This sounds like health care. No surely not!!
The Affordable Boat Act
The U.S. government has just passed a new law called: "The Affordable Boat Act" declaring that every citizen MUST purchase a new boat, by April 2014. These "affordable" boats will cost between $54,000 and $155,000 each. This does not include taxes, trailers, towing fees, licensing and registration fees, fuel, docking and storage fees, maintenance or repair costs.
This law has been passed, because until now, typically only wealthy and financially responsible people have been able to purchase boats. This new law ensures that every American can now have an "affordable" boat of their own, because everyone is "entitled" to own a boat. If you purchase your boat before the end of the year, you will receive 4 "free" life jackets; not including monthly usage fees.
In order to make sure everyone purchases an affordable boat, the costs of owning a boat will increase on average of 250-400% per year. This way, wealthy people will pay more for something that other people don't want or can't afford to maintain. But to be fair, people who can't afford to maintain their boat will be regularly fined and children (under the age of 26) can use their parent’s boats to party on until they turn 27; then they must purchase their own boat.
If you already have a boat, you can keep yours (just kidding; no you can't). If you don't want or don't need a boat, you are required to buy one anyway. If you refuse to buy one or can't afford one, you will be regularly fined $800 until you purchase one or face imprisonment. Failure to use the boat will also result in fines. People living in the desert, ghetto, inner cities, or areas with no access to lakes are not
exempt. Age, motion sickness, experience, knowledge, nor lack of desire, are acceptable excuses for not using your boat.
A government review board (that doesn't know the difference between the port, starboard, or stern of a boat) will decide everything, including: when, where, how often and for what purposes you can use your boat, along with how many people can ride your boat and determine if one is too old or healthy enough to be able to use their boat. They will also decide if your boat has out-lived its usefulness or if you must purchase specific accessories, (like a $500 compass) or a newer and more expensive boat.
Those that can afford yachts will be required to do so... it is only fair. The government will also decide the name for each boat. Failure to comply will result in fines and possible imprisonment.
Government officials are exempt from this new law. If they want a boat, they and their families can obtain boats for free, at the expense of tax payers. Unions, bankers and mega-companies with large
political affiliations ($$$) are also exempt.
--------------------------------------------
Think about it ……
Can the government make me buy a boat? BUT WAIT!! This sounds like health care. No surely not!!
The Affordable Boat Act
The U.S. government has just passed a new law called: "The Affordable Boat Act" declaring that every citizen MUST purchase a new boat, by April 2014. These "affordable" boats will cost between $54,000 and $155,000 each. This does not include taxes, trailers, towing fees, licensing and registration fees, fuel, docking and storage fees, maintenance or repair costs.
This law has been passed, because until now, typically only wealthy and financially responsible people have been able to purchase boats. This new law ensures that every American can now have an "affordable" boat of their own, because everyone is "entitled" to own a boat. If you purchase your boat before the end of the year, you will receive 4 "free" life jackets; not including monthly usage fees.
In order to make sure everyone purchases an affordable boat, the costs of owning a boat will increase on average of 250-400% per year. This way, wealthy people will pay more for something that other people don't want or can't afford to maintain. But to be fair, people who can't afford to maintain their boat will be regularly fined and children (under the age of 26) can use their parent’s boats to party on until they turn 27; then they must purchase their own boat.
If you already have a boat, you can keep yours (just kidding; no you can't). If you don't want or don't need a boat, you are required to buy one anyway. If you refuse to buy one or can't afford one, you will be regularly fined $800 until you purchase one or face imprisonment. Failure to use the boat will also result in fines. People living in the desert, ghetto, inner cities, or areas with no access to lakes are not
exempt. Age, motion sickness, experience, knowledge, nor lack of desire, are acceptable excuses for not using your boat.
A government review board (that doesn't know the difference between the port, starboard, or stern of a boat) will decide everything, including: when, where, how often and for what purposes you can use your boat, along with how many people can ride your boat and determine if one is too old or healthy enough to be able to use their boat. They will also decide if your boat has out-lived its usefulness or if you must purchase specific accessories, (like a $500 compass) or a newer and more expensive boat.
Those that can afford yachts will be required to do so... it is only fair. The government will also decide the name for each boat. Failure to comply will result in fines and possible imprisonment.
Government officials are exempt from this new law. If they want a boat, they and their families can obtain boats for free, at the expense of tax payers. Unions, bankers and mega-companies with large
political affiliations ($$$) are also exempt.
--------------------------------------------
Think about it ……
